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Honey, you know I dont like it when you lick my ears.
Umm It wasnt me. Wait, wheres the dog?

Studies show that about half of the people who own dogs allow them on the bed. Most dog owners I know account for the half that do. If you are one of them, heres a few things to keep in mind.

* You should not let puppies or untrained dogs ON the bed, let alone sleeping on it. Their early training is the time when you establish your dominance and their boundaries. Only adult dogs should earn this privilege.

* Also puppies run the risk of house training accidents. Beds are difficult to clean, and the fact that they can preserve the scent means that your dog will want to be a repeat offender.

* Above all, puppies are small. Letting them sleep in the bed is extremely unsafe.

* For dominant and Alpha dogs, avoid letting them sleep in your spot (with you in it or not). This suggests to them that they are in direct competition with you as pack leader.

* Dont ever let your dog on your bed without inviting them first. This is often communicated more with body language, such as a quick succession of pats on the area of the bed youre asking them to go to.

* Have a command for them to get off the bed too (if they are being restless and disruptive this can save a good nights sleep, and it beats shoving them off). If your dog ignores you when you ask them to get Off, youve got a bit of obedience work to do. If your dog growls at you at all, even when you attempt to adjust their position, then youve got some work to do (NOTE: dont confuse a tired moan with a growl. It can sound similar, but a moan will occur without any aggressive posturing, for example, their mouth will be shut and lips not curled, and they wont be making eye contact - their eyes might even be closed!)

* Dont ever let your dog wedge itself in between you and your partner. This can be an expression of both jealously and attempted dominance, and can escalate into more severe behaviors. They need to know that they rank lower than both of you in the pack hierarchy.

* Its best to allow your dog to sleep at the bottom end of the bed, and above the blankets.

* Some dogs like to burrow under the blankets, which is a risk not only because they can get squished, especially if theyre smaller than you, but they can also potentially suffocate under there. If you allow this, adjust the blankets after they settle in to be sure that they can easily stick their head out. Because they generate a lot of heat too, these burrowers will likely move when they get too warm anyway.

So take some care and avoid reinforcing unwanted dog behaviors. If you do, your dog will always be good in bed - so to speak.

Martin Olliver is a proud member of the Kingdom of Pets team (http://www.kingdomofpets.com). For more great articles about dogs on furniture, visit: http://kingdomofpets.com/dogobediencetraining/articles/dog_jumping_up.php